Walmart is also offering parenting classes...

I spent an hour at Walmart this morning... doing a little grocery shopping... but mainly finding supplies to decorate a Boy Scout 100 year Anniversary Cake for the Blue and Gold Banquet tomorrow night.

Brooks, my almost 17 month-old, is a very happy little guy, and usually enjoys being my little shopping side-kick. But he also has a mind of his own and is often compelled to spontaneously act out violently by arching his back, kicking, throwing things, and hitting me. It's been especially bad the past 2 days, and I have come to the conclusion that he must be suffering from MBS... "Mad Baby Syndrome". The only remedy to MBS is snacks, bottles (yes, we're both still addicted to the bottle in spite of recommendations from the pediatrician), lots of cuddle time, the freedom to walk around where one chooses, and to NOT be buckled in a car seat! Unfortunately, after only 45 minutes, he consumed all the snacks and juice in my loaded diaper bag, and managed to throw every single book/toy across every single isle in the store. So I zipped up my bag, hurried to find fondant and chocolate covered raisins all while trying to ignore the wimpering/crying/yelling baby in the basket.

By the time we got to the check-out stand, the MBS had completely taken over and he was not fit to be reasoned with. He continued to wail and cry... and threw his binky over the candy display and into the next check out line. Thank goodness no one was injured.

The cashier was very nice at first and tried to talk to him... he was silenced for a minute to take notice of her bleach-blonde mohawk, before the crying continued.

To be perfectly honest, I wasn't bothered one bit. I knew he just wanted to go home and play, so the mutual agony would inevitably be over soon. I was just doing my best to load my cart and get out of there as soon as possible.

It became very obvious, however, that the cashier had lost her patience when a river of advice came gushing out her as if a dam had broken.

Here are my favorite parts...

Cashier: "I see that your mommy didn't buy you any goldfish!"

I tried to explain that we had a 3-month supply of goldfish at home. Apparently that wasn't her purpose in saying that, because she continued....

Cashier: "Well, I like to put different snacks and stuff in those handy little zip-lock baggy things. And sometimes I carry a bag that has little toys, or books or something so they don't get bored and cry while I'm running errands."

I'm actually speechless at this point. My diaper bag is green... and if you squint it might give the illusion of camoflauge. But we're hardly in the middle of the forest, so it's a stretch that she doesn't see it heaping out of the cart next to Brooks. But regardless, does she really think that the reason for Brooks' MBS behavior is because I was unprepared? The thought of that makes my stomach churn... and I choose to force a slight smile instead of uttering the insensitive, rude remark that is running through my head.

Cashier: "Maybe he just wants a pacifier or something."

She obviously missed the UFO that landed in Check Out Line #7.

She continued to spout out suggestions with a smart-alick sort of tone... but I tried to just block it out. She was now scanning my bananas, bread and eggs, so I much preferred to swipe my card and just get out of there, because lucky for her, I didn't have PMS today!

1 diaper left...

I HATE going to the grocery store. Every time I go, I swear it will be my last... but 2 weeks later, it's time again to make another run.

I've needed to go now for about 3-4 days, but keep putting it off... I much preferred rummaging through my "food storage" to see what I could "come up with" before spending 1 1/2 hours shopping, loading up the car, unloading the car and putting it all away. And after 10+ years, I don't think I'm overstating it... grocery shopping is really the bane of my existence!

But I've searched the entire house, and I only have 1 diaper left. How did I let my supply get so low? I thought I knew better. But now I have to get dressed and comb my hair on a Friday when I did not have another reason in the world to leave the house today. My plan to hunker down, play with the kids, and maybe do a few batches of laundry?... foiled again! Maybe it's time to break into that package of emergency cloth diapers just to save my soul... (scratch my head as I consider the consequences of using a cloth diaper)... Time to put on a bra and head out for the day.

I should've slept in today.

I think I know "the schools" better then they know themselves.

We woke up this morning to 2 inches of fresh snow, and it was still snowing. I checked the messages, and the news, and they hadn't cancelled school yet. I kept dragging my feet on getting ready, because I knew that this "storm" was worthy of canceling school.

I do need to clarify something -- I'm an Alaskan -- I personally do not believe in canceling school, or ANYTHING for that matter, just because of a little snow, or even a lot of snow for that matter! In fact, I only remember one time where school was canceled in Alaska, and it wasn't because of snow... it was because of severe cold (-40 or colder). But after ten years of living here in Richmond, I've learned to predict when school will be canceled. And after much reluctance, I realize that not everyone is used to driving in snow, and that Virginia does not have the resources to adequately clear snow. Therefore, I understand the need to cancel school, work and church... even though I think it's completely ridiculous, and I often feel like the laughing stock of my fellow Alaskans.

So the reason for my frustration this morning, is not because they canceled school.... it's because they canceled school at 7:33 a.m.!

I can read minds... and I know what the school county officials were thinking.... "We've already cancelled school for 4 days, and delayed it 2 hours one day... we really don't want to cancel it again. Maybe if we wait a little longer, it will all just disappear! We can't make decisions. We don't know what to do! Oh wait, I know! Let's wait until 17 minutes before school starts... when people have already shoveled their driveways and brushed off their cars, when buses are already picking up kids, when kids are already arriving at school, and when parents have already left for work! Yes, that's a great idea!... Make the calls!"

So now, after an emergency canceling of schools due to inclement weather the snow stops falling 48 minutes later. It's almost embarrassing that after just 2 inches of snow, once again, everything is shut down.

Now, my eyes are burning and I'm very tired... and I wish that I was still in bed, oblivious to all this snow drama.

music in the playroom is like magic!

As you know, I've been rearranging, revamping, reorganizing, redoing, reframing, basically all things "re---". So I had a little cd player that needed a home, so up to the playroom it went. I turned it on just for kicks, and it was almost hypnotizing to my 4 year-old and 1 year-old.

There was a little dancing, but there was a lot of "organized play". They just went about their business and played so great independently and together. WHY DID I NOT THINK OF THIS BEFORE??

The Domino Effect...

... the consequence of one event setting off a chain of similar events...

This has been happening at my house lately.

It all began when I decided to move an armoir upstairs into the playroom to hold the Wii, DVD player and computer. My husband and a friend tackled the treacherous and death-defying stunt of carrying the armoir up the stairs in our 2-story foyer... They wrenched their backs with every step, and I swooned in fear at every pivot. According to my calculations and knowledge of angles and physics, I was certain, on 6 separate occasions, that it would topple over the railing and crash to it's demise. After what seemed like forever, and nothing short of miracle, the armoir found a cozy little corner of the playroom for its home, hopefully for a long time, since I know Mike will never want to move it again!


In the meantime, we inherited a free red couch from a friend. After much debate, we decided to put the couch in the playroom for comfy seating. But after unhinging the door and entertaining the thought of cutting off the legs, the couch would not fit through the door. So back down it went. Shoved into a corner, it sat there unbalanced in the room. At first, it seemed like there was no way to make 2 semi-large couches fit into this small room. But, I made a 911-call to another friend to help remedy the "dilemma of 2 couches" in the living room. We brainstormed... we shifted and moved... we imagined and visualized for almost 2 hours. This is testimony that ANYTHING is possible when 2 moms put their heads together to rearrange a room. It may be breaking a few rules, and it's far from perfect... but it will get me by for now.


All of this triggered a series of unavoidable events... "bring the desk upstairs downstairs and put it behind the couch, take apart that playhouse and move it outside, move the bookcase in the hallway into the playroom, move these pictures there, and put those pictures over there, bring that table out of the garage and put it up there, move that end table over here, move the piano over there"... and all of this moving around calls for "uh-oh, vacuum over there... sweep up over here..." It also invoked some serious motivation to "frame this picture and put it there... and hang up that mirror there... and scour the attic for something to fill up that wall there... and spend all afternoon painting some artwork for that room". Then there's the endless task of "clean out that basket so I can put it here... and dump out that one because I think it will look cuter over there... and now what do I do with all these piles HERE?"

It's an endless process, and I'm not even close to being done. But it's been an adventure and it keeps me busy, my husband guessing and the kids tripping over everything in sight! Despite how it sounds, this has not been a series of unfortunate events... but rather a chain-reaction of little jobs that will hopefully help things to run smoother around here. And in the end, maybe I'll be able to enjoy it before the cycle starts all over again!

what's the big deal about a dropping ball?

Here is a summary of a phone conversation, or rather, a series of random thoughts, I had with my sister, ShaLene, on New Year's Eve...

"New Year's Eve is so overrated... especially when you have kids, you don't drink, and you'd prefer not to stay up past midnight. So, why people flock to New York City to watch a giant ball of lights fall slowly down a pole has always been a mystery to me!... it actually seems a bit backwards...a ball dropping? Really? ... I would much rather see a ball of lights shooting into the sky and exploding, triggering a full-blown fireworks show that was put to music! ... and now that I think about it, who really cares about a big ball?... what about a screeching rocket, that upon the stroke of midnight, explodes into fireworks... And better yet, they could have something parachute down.... what about penguins? yeah, and once they reach the ground, they could perform a choreographed routine similar to, but better then, their original debut on Mary Poppins!.... But that would be hard to train penguins to parachute and dance... So let's just stick to the screeching rocket exploding into a fireworks display. But then what about the rocket pieces plummeting out of the sky and hitting people in the streets? Hmmm... Well, maybe it shouldn't actually explode... Hmmm... I guess something shooting into the air does have it's down-sides.... Well, maybe instead of the ball floating slowly down, the ball should come crashing downward at an unbelievable speed and explode down at the bottom?? Ooh yeah... that would be cool... and the anticipation of waiting for the crash would be a lot better then just waiting for the ball to eventually reach the bottom after 30 seconds, and then light up. Yes, a fast-dropping ball would be much better.... But then again, if the ball crashed into a million pieces, they would have to make a new ball every year, and THAT would get expensive...and who would be paying for that??? Taxpayers.... so no, scratch the idea of the exploding-lightning speed-dropping ball.

Hmmmm.... ya know, maybe the "National New Year's Eve Committee" already thought of all this... they wanted to do something dramatic and exciting like screeching rockets, dancing penguins and fast exploding balls... but there just wasn't enough resources to do it every year. So they had to just stick to the basics.... Yes, I think a ball dropping slowly 30 seconds prior to the stroke of midnight IS a good idea. And ya know, they DO have the new year light up at the bottom... so that's pretty cool. And they drop a lot of confetti, and that's kinda fun.

So, I guess a ball dropping is pretty cool... and it's what people are used to and have grown up watching... so I guess it's a fun national tradition! I guess it would be fun to go to NYC and see it in real life someday."

Hope you all had a Happy New Year!!!

NOT Noteworthy!

Some of you may have heard about the historic snowfall of December 18th, 2009. I have been fighting the urge to post about this... despite the fact that my boys absolutely loved the snow... and because we went sledding, built a snow fort and played in it for days. The reason it pains me to write about it, is because growing up in Alaska, snow in December was not something that made national news. It was normal. People didn't rush out to the nearest store to stockpile bread and milk to last them through the "storm". They didn't cancel parties or wedding receptions or church. They didn't delay holiday traditions at the mere scent of snow. But, here in Virginia, life comes to a screeching halt when rumors start flying about a snowfall.

But nevertheless, I am writing about this snowfall. It was relaxing to look out the window on Christmas Day and see a white landscape, even if it was raining... and I have to admit that the sight of a few snow patches in the yard after 10 days, does my heart good!

TRENTADUE FLICKS

Tune in for the highlights of 2009... and get a glimpse into our favorite flicks!!





CAST OF CHARACTERS:
Mike: as “Real Estate Dad”
KaLisi: as “Household Managing Mom”
Josh – age 7: as “Baseball Playing 2nd Grader”
Caleb – age 4: as “Bike-Riding Pre-Schooler”
Brooks – age 1: as “Toddling Bundle of Rolls”

FEATURING:
NCIS – (Naughty Children Investigative Service) is more than just an action drama. With silly doses of humor, it focuses on the complex and always amusing dynamics of three young boys forced to work together in mischievous situations. Mike and KaLisi continue to brush up on their forensic skills to determine the “victim” from the “perpetrator” in every crime. Test your own forensic skills by predicting which family member, who in a strange turn of events, backed into Mike’s car one dark night.

LOST – We’re constantly teasing you with mysteries, but here’s a few things that we know for sure... Josh continues to lose teeth at an alarming rate; to date, he has lost 7! Caleb is always moving and we often refer to him as a pocket of powerful electromagnetic energy! This energy often rubs off onto Josh and Brooks, which usually leads to destruction of mass proportions! Brooks, who often appears shirtless, can hypnotize the Others with his sultry gaze and round physique.

24 – 24 is broadcast in the semblance of real time, with each season depicting a 24-hour period in the lives of The Trentadue Five, who work together and fight against threats of H1N1, the broken-garage-door-incident, which trapped a mother and her children in the house for three days, and the Fall of 2009, which buried the Trentadue’s with leaves until two brave missionaries raked them out!

Million Dollar Listing – The first season premiered in 2001, and now focuses on the real estate market in Richmond, Virginia. It follows a very prestigious real estate agent at ReMax Action. The storylines range from a down-town listing becoming the final resting place for a local vagrant, to numerous awkward advances from a flirtatious married client. Unlike the show’s title, Mike likes to keep it in the Hundred-Thousand Dollar range.

Cake Boss – This reality show stars the owner of KaLisi’s Bakery. Hundreds of meals go on her table lined with four hungry boys, who have been known to chant, “We want food! We want food!” She’s a one-woman team and has even tried her hand at decorating the kids’ birthday cakes… although she won’t be winning any prizes, the boys loved her first ever Sponge Bob and Teddy Bear cakes!

Sponge Bob Square Pants – This animated series is an extremely energetic story, which centers on the adventures of three brothers who live in a brick, colonial in the Southeast. Some episodes include: “Life of Crime”, which depicts the lone Joshua’s spontaneous excursion around the neighborhood; “No More Mr. Scaredy Pants” featuring Caleb’s victory over the indoor inflatables at Kangaroo Jac’s; and “Overboard”, a heart-wrenching tale of Brooks’ sudden upside-down plunge into the baby pool!

Flash Forward – What’s in our near future? Josh will be baptized in March… Caleb will be starting Kindergarten next fall… and Brooks will graduate to nursery in April! We look forward to many other 2010 milestones in our family and wouldn’t change it, even if we could!

Wishing you all a very Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!
Love, The Trentadue's

one down... one to go....

turns out the disposal worked fine... but the drain was clogged. Did you know that the #1 rule about disposals is: If you can't eat it, neither can the disposal???

This was news to me... so no eggshells (which I've read help to sharpen the blades), and no lemon peels (which will freshen the smell)! Maybe I should write to Real Simple and tell them that according to my plumber, they have written false information in their magazine! Oh and one more thing... they said rice is one of the worst things to put down because it expands and fills up the drain pipe. Who knew?

A disposal is also not to be used as a garbage can.... maybe they should change the name to something other then "GARBAGE DISPOSAL"! I guess the real purpose of it is to grind up the tiny bits of food left on the plate once it has been scraped into the actual garbage can. So it turns out, I probably need that "wet garbage bucket" under my sink after all!

P.S. I'm assuming when they come to fix my washing machine tomorrow they're going to tell me that I can't bathe the kids in there either! I guess I need to read the instruction manuals on a few things! :)

it all started yesterday...

I just got back from a "girls' night out" tonight.... and from doing laundry. Yes, I did both at the same time! I did my laundry at a friend's house during our "get together". All this because my washer quit today mid-load... so I had to wring out a whole batch of clothes by hand, and then load it into a hefty bag, drive 8 minutes, run it through the spin cycle, and then dry it. What a process, right? (if you can't tell, I'm mocking myself)

but to be completely honest, it was pretty inconvenient. But the washer breaking is only the straw that broke my back, because yesterday the garbage disposal gave out. But unlike the washer, I do have a few tricks up my sleeve when it comes to the disposal. Google and You Tube have lovely little sites about what to do in case your disposal clogs or jams. And rest assured, I've already tried all the quick-fix-it tips that are suggested. Afterall, a garbage disposal is a very simple machine, so they say, consisting of a basic motor and blades used to chop everything up. I used the allen wrench to "un-jam it trick", I pushed the red reset button many, many times, all with different combinations of "holding it down for 5 seconds" vs. "the rapid pressing method"... I proceeded to do the ole' "jiggle it a little trick", followed by the "hit it violently until your hand hurts method" .... not to mention, "stick your hand down there and fish out any foreign objects procedure" (although I think "they" suggested using a broom handle)... I even COMMANDED it to start working.... but nothing.

Now, I have to explain a bit... if you don't have a disposal, this may all seem very trivial. But having a non-working disposal is so much worse then not having a disposal at all, because nothing drains right. You can't use that sink at all. And if you do, it just fills up with nasty, gray water with a floaties, until you can scoop out the water 1/4 cup at a time, until the water recedes from the sink and back down the drain hole. It's really a gross process.

But luckily, after all this, I have some clarity about our little misfortunes.... I think our house likes to keep us humble by simultaneously sabotaging various mechanical machines within it's walls to force us to reflect on how lucky we are to have such modern conveniences at our finger-tips. (We've had quite a few in our recent past... the dishwasher, storm door, and garage door, just to name a few.) For instance, if my washer had NOT broken down today, I would have never reminisced about the pioneer women, and how freakishly strong their fore arms must have been. (Seriously, my hands were cramping up after wringing out 2 pairs of jeans.)... And how grateful I am that I don't have to have a bucket under my sink specifically for "wet garbage that won't burn" like we had growing up.

So really, I should be thanking my lucky potato peels (that's what clogged up the disposal in the first place), for this opportunity to be appreciative for what I have... and that all it takes is a phone call to our home-warranty repair guy to come out and fix it! it really is THAT easy! (I hope!)