I was reading a friend's blog today and was reminded of an experience that happened to me when I was in high school.

One day on the way to seminary, the car was quiet as me and my dad made the 10-minute commute to the church building. (seminary is a morning scripture study class for high-schoolers) I thought we were both noticing the silence, but at 6:05 am, I was not alert enough to be a social butterfly. I had other things on my mind... cramps.
Dad was the first to break the silence by asking the following question, "So, how long are your periods?" I thought this was completely out of character for him to be asking about my menstrual cycle, especially since he always turned the channel whenever a tampon commercial came on tv. But maybe he was trying to reach out and connect... however odd it was. So after a few seconds of internal arguing, I allowed myself to utter the words, "About 4-5 days."

"Oh no," he said, "I meant your class periods."

I wanted to slap myself! Of course that made more sense... he's a SCHOOL TEACHER! So asking me about my class periods was the logical explanation for his question. But in my defense... when you're on your period, that is often the ONLY thing on your brain!

I was, however, grateful that it was pitch-dark outside, so he wouldn't be able to see the shades of red I was turning. I tried to keep my voice steady as I appeased him with a play-by-play of each class. I think we were both very desperate to keep talking to avoid any more gaps in the conversation that would surely lead to disaster!

Sadly, this was NOT the last time I have embarrassed myself by saying something stupid.

Speaking of periods, this is BY FAR the BEST commercial I have ever seen!!! Enjoy!

***The picture of the confused little boy, is NOT one of my children... in case any of you were wondering.

seems harmless, doesn't he? ... don't be deceived.

I know what you're thinking... how could a mother have anything negative to say about this lil' guy?

And in all honesty, there are a lot of REALLY GREAT things about our little Brooks. He is happy most of the time... he has mastered "independent play"... he is a great eater... he makes people laugh... he is entertained by the slightest thing... he goes to bed so easily and sleeps all night... he has the best laugh... he only poops once a day... he's not a mama's boy, so I can leave him with sitters... he loves his big brothers...and the list goes on.

But my "little friend", as I endearingly refer to him, has a side of him that can be pure evil! He throws the worst temper tantrums of all my kids and it is getting exhausting. In his defense, the temper tantrums are becoming fewer and farther between... but they have NOT lessened in intensity.

His latest tactic is to take it out on me physically by pinching, scratching, hitting and pulling out my earrings. He has learned that doing this pushes my buttons and causes my innards to literally quake! In fact, fastening Brooks into a car seat requires more patience and strength then I am often capable of... To give you a visual, he more accurately resembles a CAT being strapped into a car seat, then a baby. Changing a diaper is a similar scene... only he inherits OCTOPUS qualities and manages to wrap his legs around my arms, arches his back and twists his body so it's close to impossible to get a diaper on or off. And holding him up to the sink to wash his hands and face turns into a wrestling match with a 30 lb KING SALMON!

The only positive thing about these tantrums is it enables me to get a work out by simply doing every day tasks. After all, I'm a "glass is half-full" sort of girl. (wink)
#1 Reason I'm feeling cranky....

At Josh's last baseball game, a little girl (about 6 years old) approached me wondering if I was the mother of a certain toddler who was carrying a "dangerous" stick that was a whopping 5 inches long, and 1/4 inch thick. I informed her that I was. She cocked her head to the side, as if she was sizing me up wondering if I was fit to be a mother, and she politely asked how old I was.

I managed an awkward smile, and replied, "Mommies don't like to tell how old they are."

"If you don't tell me, then you would be lying." she said.

"I'm not lying... I just don't want to talk about it." I shot back.

She the proceeded to point out all the wrinkles on my face and neck that she could find. I argued that what she called "wrinkles" were simply, or more appropriately called "laugh lines" and "neck bending lines". She wasn't convinced.

I then proceeded to ask her how old her mom was. She confidently professed that her mother was 40.

"Guess what? Your mom is older then me!"
#2 Reason I'm feeling cranky...

During that same game, another little girl was admiring the same toddler who was now sporting a dirt-covered bottom and a dirt ring around his mouth. She asked me how much he weighed. Then 1/2 second later, before I could answer, she asked how much I weighed.

Already feeling defensive from my last encounter, I replied, "Mommies don't like to tell how much they weigh."

"My mom will tell me how much she weighs."

"Really? Why don't you go ask her."

It's times like this that I'm glad I'm a mother of BOYS!

I started today off with a bang!

After being up late last night, I pushed the snooze a couple times, but was eventually woken up by Josh (my 2nd grader) saying it was time for school. I sat up to start the morning routine....

The next thing I know, it's black, and I'm on the floor... and my head is pounding!

Are you confused? Join the club.

I start thinking back on what I can remember... and I realize that all I remember is watching Josh walk out of the room.

I immediately start wimpering to my husband for help. I attempted to cry, because it seemed logical that's what one would do if they just passed out, banged their face on the night stand and then fell to the floor, but no tears came. Just a throbbing. I stood up, a little more carefully this time, and metaphorically handed Mike my "Get-back-in-bed-and-go-to-sleep-card". Mike took Josh to school, and thankfully I've managed to stay conscious all day.

My knight in shining armor...

Oh you... with your shiny, off-white complexion... and your bright yellow "Energy Guide" sticker plastered on your side. Oh you, with your WARNING label, which so eloquently states the risk of fire and explosion that could often result in serious injury and death... and don't get me started on your exposed water pipes and hoses!

I must confess... after 24 days without hot water, in a matter of hours, I have been smitten by this stalwart appliance which stands silent and isolated in my garage. It has enticed me with the hot water flowing from the kitchen faucet... even Brooks was tantalized by the steam as it rose to the ceiling... and I find myself craving the warm embrace of HOT WATER!!! Seriously, I can't help myself!

But how can you blame me? After countless cold showers, I have forgotten what it feels like to soak in a hot tub. Although I am thankful to our previous water heater for it's brutal incentive to make me start working out again, (fyi: it's much easier to take a cold shower when you're hot and sweaty) I'm in desperate need of hot water to soothe my aching body, as it appears that all the cold showers have not only given me a temporary case of "clenched jaw", but I'm currently fighting a cold.

So, welcome to the family, dearest hot-water-heater... we welcome you with open arms!

SIDEBAR: Is it possible that the plumber who was obviously smoking in my garage, managed to get smoke in the pipes, and now I smell smoke when I turn on the water? ... whatever, a small price to pay in my opinion!

in case you were wondering...

19 days without hot water... I don't even remember what a hot shower feels like.


Today my mind is overflowing with deadlines... some of them are good... some are not so good. I have a lot of little things hanging over my head, and I just want to get them done!
Here's my list:

-3 days to get ready for the Father/Son Campout
-30 days to complete driving school
-8 days to think about my new hair style
-5 days to prepare a sharing time lesson
-45 days to pack and prepare for our Alaska trip
-13 days to prepare Caleb for his Kindergarten Assessment
-2 days to get my dining room table cleared off
-5 hours until LOST comes on (I don't know that really even like it that much... but I've invested 6 years of my life in this show... I want to see how it ends!)
-1 hour until Brooks wakes up
-2 hours to figure out what's for dinner
-number of days to go without hot water?... unknown.
-2 more days until Field Day
-14 more days until Concession Duty at the baseball field
-39 more days til I turn "one year older and wiser too"
-5 more days til Mother's Day, aka the most non-relaxing day of the year! (seriously, why does it have to be on Sunday?)
-20 minutes until the clothes in the dryer are dry

and last, but not least...


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